Is this a good time to bring up the fact that I like football? Thought it might be a gimme since I’m a lesbian…I don’t in fact like beer. I will drink anything else…just not beer, but being gay I like football so sooner or later your gonna have to sit thru a football post. That day has come, ladies and gentlemen…and no, long hair in football is not gay. A room full of lesbians watching football is gay…and fun I might add.
But seriously, on the NFL front the owners are working up to a vote next week on whether or not players will have to cut their hair…OK…technically, the Chiefs will address the concern of long hair covering a player’s jersey.
As it stands the league states that hair is part of the uniform, and there is no penalty for grabbing hair to tackle a player, but in the past this has been a gray area, with Chief’s Johnson penalized for tackling Steeler’s Polamalu in 2006. Officials said it was “lifting” the hair after the tackle that caused the unsportsmanlike conduct foul, but it’s 2008 and the Chief’s are still sore about it obviously.
Personally, I’ve got short hair and would freak out if anyone grabbed my hair to tackle me…even if I was playing a friendly game of touch football with the Mainline lesbians of the Outskirts. But hey, those guys are hard core…let ‘em play ball. But I like the idea of putting in a safety rule just in case it gets out of hand. Sure the shoulder pads and the helmet are part of the uniform, but you have “horse collar” and “face mask” calls right?
Well I’ve got the answer:

Why not…5 yards if you grab and let go. A full 15 yards if you grab on and take him down. Don’t tell me it’s a gray area. I watched the entire season last year trying to find out when a ref was going to call pass interference or when he was going to let a defender actually defend.
My girlfriend has a call of the year. At the beginning of the year she gets the “new foul” or “new term” and zones in on it. Year before last…”stinger“…the hit that caused your arm to go numb. Last year…you guessed it…”horse collar“. She’d see it happen and be screaming, “Oh my God…did you see that, it was such a horse collar…how did that guy get away with that?!” The friends at the house or the strangers at the bars would all go, yea…that chick knows her sports…then yell…”Hell yea, girl…where was the ref on that call?!” Got us free drinks…what can I say…you think I’m joking, but we live right outside of Philly…she’s a “wicked-hard-core” Eagles fan.
Yeah…remember I was born in Dallas…that’s fun at the bar during football season also…I’ve lived here long enough to be an Eagles fan unless they play the Cowboys, and I always bring homemade margaritas, so that goes a long ways to mend fences…and I can keep very quiet and smile very big…it’s just football right?
So look for the vote next week and how long are we waiting…early August for the first pre-season game? Play ball and play nice…