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I’m not sure if you’ve noticed it lately, but there’s been great deal of disasters and catastrophes happening. Tsunamis, tornadoes (not just in Texas and Kansas, and coming down the pike at about 10 at a time). Hurricanes, freak snow storms, disease resistant viruses, frogs, locusts, hail…you name it, I’ve watched some crazy reporter is a slicker stand in it and report about it.

The right side of my brain tells me it’s global warming, El Niño, and soft molten liquid core shifting on tectonic plates. The left side…honestly, my left side is telling us that Mother Nature is pissed, and kicking our not so ever-loving ass.

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What? you say…it’s just a matter of closing that tear in the ozone, stopping the icebergs from melting away, and stuffing some depleted Uranium 238 down the holes where we’ve sucked out all the oil. Problem solved. I’m busy solving world hunger and cancer this week…do it yourself.

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The foxhole atheist in me says I’d run like hell, and try to survive the big one, but the dirt eating pessimist says f*ck it…we deserve to perish.

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What? Treason against my own species? What about the children? Me forget about the children? When our species is living far beyond our biological niche, thanks to our super brains and super technology…we’ve got more children than ever…I’m surprised that the group still living in the Middle Ages isn’t worried that all the kids will fall off the sides of this flat Earth…which is the center of all the Universe.

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To be truthful, my Earth might be spherical, but I fall into the trap of wrapping myself up in the warm nurturing blanket of self importance, just as much as anyone. I too hit the snooze button on the wake-up call our planet is giving us. She keeps alarming and I keep nodding off. I’m lazy and self centered that way. Fat happy convenience and the life span of less than 100 years will do that to a human. It’s nice of Mother Nature and the Earth to at least give us the chance to hear the alarm, but I doubt if we will stop our steady destruction of the very ground we supposedly call hallow.

Even the hope I feel recycling my Coke Zero cans and getting my Subaru Outback all muddy to rescue some furry thing I found on a hike…even that hope isn’t enough to stop the lesson. Stupid things like remembering so many more fireflies out in the yard when I was little. Each year I see them, but the count is down as are my spirits. Tread water, pass bills, pick up trash, bike to work…What it will do is prolong Mother Nature’s whipping for another generation…and then another generation after that…maybe. You see, because there’s another big factor. We like whipping ourselves. And we do it well.

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I think we’re going at a much faster pace than Mother Nature is. Our hatred and fear of each other creates bigger horrors than any Mother Nature could dream up. For what? Person, self, soul. This end is most surely a justification as well as punishment for the means. Natural or man-made…the end will come. With the Earth being about 4.5 billion years old, humans have only spent the last 195,000 years here. Sounds like a lot…but it’s not. And we’ve been busy. Here’s some perspective…quiz to follow.

Picture a 24 hour clock. Take all the time which has passed from the start of the known universe until today and compare it to the sweep of the hands on the 24 hour clock. The current belief is that the clock started 12 billion years ago.

To represent this on a 24 hour clock, each hour’s sweep of the hand would represent 500 million years (1/2 billion years). On this clock the hand swept for about 15 hours before the earth, sun and the planets start forming thus starting geological time (4.5 billion year ago).

Life on our planet started only after the clock had been running for 23 hours or about one hour ago (representing 500 million years ago), 28 seconds ago after the clock had been sweeping around for 23 hours 59 minutes and 32 seconds humans came down from the trees (5 million years ago), 3/4 of a second ago humans began speaking. On the clock of all known time, human history is not as long as one second. Less than one second ago contains all usable human knowledge.

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zzzzzzzzz…Wake up mortals…my Biology lesson is over, but Mother’s isn’t. We’re f*cked and I’m not sure it’s a bad thing. Let the Earth go back to the way it was. Let the monsters die out and the animals live in peace, or maybe just biological harmony.