Outsports
Snowboarder Ryan Miller suffers for his sport.
Two years ago he screwed up his ankle during one run. Last year he crashed into a gate and messed up his left knee. And his most recent injury cost him any chance at landing a spot on the U.S. Winter Olympic team.
“I could barely stand up,” said Miller, 26, from his training center in Steamboat Springs, Colo. That’s what a chipped vertebrae that initially knocks your spine off up to 3 inches will do. Miller, a gay professional Alpine snowboarder, sent his back into spasms during a training run a week before Olympic qualifying races Jan. 4-6.
The crash sent him flying through the air and knocked him unconscious. Amazingly, his injuries did not prevent him from competing at the snowboarding trials at Mt. Bachelor, Ore. They did, however, keep him from performing anywhere near his peak, and Miller finished a combined 21st for his two runs. Only the top three qualified for Salt Lake City.
With his Olympics chances gone, Miller is now setting his sights on making the U.S. national team this year or next, with the hopes of being an Olympian in 2006.
“Injuries like this are common,” Miller said. “You’re going 40 to 50 miles per hour, basically on one ski … the slightest miscalculation” can cause a crash.
Tired of Acting
Despite his travails on the slopes, Miller is a man at peace. It’s what coming out has meant to him. Miller is the only openly elite gay snowboarder in the U.S. (“and I don’t know of any who are even closeted,” he says), having come out during the 2000-2001 season. He has known he was gay since his sophomore year in college.
During the winter of 2000-2001, Miller was part of a mixed-gender professional snowboarding team. Which meant he was eating, sleeping, training, competing and socializing with the same group of people full-time for months.
“I just got tired of putting on a straight-acting role,” says Miller, a native of Pennsylvania. “I would listen to [teammates'] stories and it was uncomfortable for me to make up the lies.” Looking back, Miller has no regrets about coming out. “It took a lot of stress off me and has made me happier.”
Miller made his declaration on a team trip to Vancouver, British Columbia, when a group of teammates invited him to join them on a trip to a local strip club. He declined, simply stating, “I’m not into that … I’m gay.” He received a shoulder colder than a Canadian winter from his teammates save for two women and one man. Invitations to social events dried up, the camaraderie ended and he was basically shunned.
The reaction from fellow athletes seems to go against the public perception of snowboarders as free-spirited, anything-goes types. But not all snowboarders are created equal. The extreme, radical crowd is into freestyle snowboarding, halfpipe in Olympic terminology. They are judged in their event akin to figure skaters.
Miller’s discipline, in contrast, is Alpine snowboarding, which uses a longer and more narrow board and whose events “don’t give as much room for self-expression.” In Alpine, the clock rules: whoever makes it down the hill the fastest (while navigating a series of slalom gates) wins.
“Freestylers are more likely to be more accepting of gays,” Miller says. The Alpine side is more conservative, the equipment more expensive, with much fewer places to train.
Despite his sport’s more conservative nature, Miller is very out and proud. His board boasts stickers from his sponsors: Outboard.org (a gay and lesbian snowboarding group); Team Philadelphia (whose pink triangle is hard to miss) and Team Flame (an organization for gay elite athletes).